Two (Kind-of-Different) Ways to Have a Healthy Marriage
November 2, 2015
Ephesians 5:1-2
My wife and I have been married 9 years, so by no means am I a marriage guru. I do not work for Focus on the Family, and I am not a professional counselor. With that said, in reflecting on some things that have helped our marriage, I realized some surprising helps. Of course, the core stuff you always hear about are essential: good communication, resolving conflict in a healthy manner, quality time, never abusing one another. The two the things I’m about to mention will not help much if you’re not doing these basics. But here are two kind-of-different ways to have a healthy marriage: 1. Support Each Other-This may seem kind of obvious and not so different, but I rarely see true support in most marriages. By “support” I do not mean tolerate, endure, or just get by. I mean being intentional in encouraging and complimenting one another. I mean being there for one another and sacrificing to help your spouse achieve goals. Stay away from manipulation and competition with your spouse. Instead, “take delight in honoring one another;” 2. Live for Something Big- As a couple, pursue a lifestyle that helps those in need. Live for something bigger than your own relationship. I think Jesus would like this, and it’s a great example for your own kids. Mission trips, adoption, and foster care have brought us closer in a variety of ways. Of course, we do not serve in order to have a healthy marriage; but looking back it has had that affect. The scriptures are correct: “It is more blessed to give, than to receive.”
My wife and I have been married 9 years, so by no means am I a marriage guru. I do not work for Focus on the Family, and I am not a professional counselor. With that said, in reflecting on some things that have helped our marriage, I realized some surprising helps. Of course, the core stuff you always hear about are essential: good communication, resolving conflict in a healthy manner, quality time, never abusing one another. The two the things I’m about to mention will not help much if you’re not doing these basics. But here are two kind-of-different ways to have a healthy marriage: 1. Support Each Other-This may seem kind of obvious and not so different, but I rarely see true support in most marriages. By “support” I do not mean tolerate, endure, or just get by. I mean being intentional in encouraging and complimenting one another. I mean being there for one another and sacrificing to help your spouse achieve goals. Stay away from manipulation and competition with your spouse. Instead, “take delight in honoring one another;” 2. Live for Something Big- As a couple, pursue a lifestyle that helps those in need. Live for something bigger than your own relationship. I think Jesus would like this, and it’s a great example for your own kids. Mission trips, adoption, and foster care have brought us closer in a variety of ways. Of course, we do not serve in order to have a healthy marriage; but looking back it has had that affect. The scriptures are correct: “It is more blessed to give, than to receive.”